Little gourmand...

Last night, I gave Rachel a couple of crackers while I warmed up dinner for myself. Rachel showed no interest in the asparagus and penne, but as soon as I microwaved a plate of walnuts and rosemary, she went to town! It's a very easy summer dish I make with mashed-up anchovies, walnuts, rosemary, olive oil, garlic and rotini.

I dropped a couple of rotini on Rachel's high chair tray and she couldn't get enough of them, probably because they're small and squiggly. She ate almost every one, even the pieces that dropped on her bib!

This morning at daycare, I brought along a cup of yogurt Drew bought on the advice of a mom he met, who suggested getting the thick and creamy kind (which I hate). Rachel ate about a third of a container of vanilla yogurt a couple of weeks ago, and we never got around to feeding her the second container of strawberry yogurt that Drew bought.

Today, she ate almost every bit of it. I told Drew that I think we should just give her different flavors of yogurt every morning and dial back a bit on the jarred food. (I'm also thinking that the acid in the yogurt might help clear up Rachel's nasty yeast infection...). Her lack of enthusiasm for jarred dinner food last night makes me think that we are fast moving to all grown-up food. Hard to believe!

Little Miss Sunshine

Valentina, one of the daycare ladies, looked at me with adoration this morning while I was feeding Rachel.

"I love your litte girl," she sighed. "She never cries, not unless there's a reason."

"Oh, thank you!" I gushed. "We love her too."

We do, especially when she snuggles into mommy's soft spots (tummy, chest) or leans her head against me, and slaps me on the arm multiple times, like she did on Saturday when I got home from work. I think that was her way of telling me she missed me!

Drew's nickname for her is "wumpus gallumpus." I have no idea where that came from, but it sounds like a terrific name for an imaginary friend.

Mine is "lovely one." "Hello, lovely one!" I said cheerfully to her this morning. Drew really liked that.

A perfect day

..it began with a lazy breakfast (Rachel slept through the night, so I am almost caught up on all my sleep!), naptime at 10 a.m. (for Rachel, not me), then when she woke up we met my friend Amy, from work, and her 2-year-old son, Jake. We headed out to Wilshire Park, the one with the great kids playground, and we happened upon...a free concert! From the Portland Wind Ensemble! Great music -- made even better in the 70-degree weather, under the trees -- and I managed to catch the last song, a stirring Sousa march, with Rachel on my lap.

Amy, who is obviously way more skilled as a mom than I am, actually brought food for us all to share (I had fed Rachel a bottle before we left, and had some food for her in the diaper bag, but none for myself). Amy had Ziploc bags of canteloupe, crackers and cherries.

Well. You would have thought Rachel hadn't eaten in a week. As soon as she discovered the cherries (which I bit into, then handed to her without the pits), she couldn't get enough of them. Or the canteloupe, or crackers. And when she had finished the canteloupe and crackers, she headed straight back to the cherries. She picked up the Ziploc and tried to figure out how to open it!

She spent about 45 minutes snacking and didn't whine once, sitting contentendly on the blanket, chewing away, while Amy and I talked about grown-up stuff.

We came back home in the late afternoon and after one false start, I managed to get Rachel down for a nap. I made a leek and mushroom tart for dinner, some strawberry bread that is now baking in the oven, and we got her to sleep at 9:15. Let's hope she's down for the night.

The only teeny downside of this wonderfully Portland summer day: The cherries made Rachel poop enthusiastically -- we had to change her outfit and diaper several times before bed. I only know it was the fruit because Amy told me so. Man, do I have a lot to learn.

Rachel & Dad

...had a great time yesterday (well, before she woke up yowling. See previous post). They went to Babies 'R Us, where Drew bought magnetic letters to stick on the refrigerator to replace the magnets she peels off and likes to chew. Then to the park, where they met more baby friends: Adeline, 15 months, who crawled onto our blanket and played with Rachel's toys while Drew was taking Rachel on the slide (she slid down all by herself! Drew scooped her up at the bottom, and she LOVED that).

Then, while Adeline's mom was pushing her on the swings, Drew held Rachel in his arms and swung her up and down, too. When the girls realized they were both swinging, they reached out their arms toward each other. It was so cute! Drew said.

Then they met Talia, whose grandparents are originally from Israel and were visiting from Detroit. They complimented Rachel on how big her eyes are and how curious she is. Drew proudly told them she's been that way since birth.

Not again...

First, the good news: We had a lovely Shabbat dinner last night. Drew had fixed asparagus and pasta for us, so by the time I got home from synagogue we were able to eat as soon as I walked in the door. During dinner I gave Rachel a crust of dinner bread -- fancy supermarket bread with olives in it -- and she had a blast gnawing on it, biting it and gumming it until she generously handed it back to me, as she does with all of her food these days. She'll take a bite of a Cheerio or cracker or strawberry and when it's completely covered with her saliva, she sticks out her hand with the food in it toward me and gives a big smile. I have no idea why she does this. Maybe she wants to know if I'm proud of her?

I did take a picture of her eating bread. When I have time, I'll post it to my Facebook account. We are frantically busy these days getting the house ready for her 1-year-old birthday celebration. Plus, we are insulating the attic and it is a mess upstairs. We have to figure out where dozens of empty boxes, plus old screens and window frames, will end up -- in our basement or at a home recycling center?

Bottom line: I've been kinda busy.

And now the bad news: Rachel decided that 1 a.m. was an excellent time to scream and sob for no reason. It was the second time last night she did that and the third time this week. I am hoping hoping hoping this is not a repeat of the agony we went through this spring, when she seemed to have forgotten how to sleep through the night. Since I work a 7 a.m. to 3 p.m. shift on Saturdays, it was critical that I get sleep. So I went to the basement, turned on a CD of ocean sounds and...couldn't get to sleep for another two hours, between Drew stomping around angrily upstairs, trying to calm The Little Girl down, and me being hungry (as I always am when Rachel wakes me up). I ate a cup of applesauce but it was still a while before I could fall asleep.

Last week I visited a friend with a new baby and got envious of those first few weeks of mommyhood. Now I am back to envying women (like the rabbi's wife I met last night) with kids old enough to SLEEP THROUGH THE NIGHT, PERMANENTLY. The rabbi's wife has 4 kids -- a 16-year-old boy and 10-year-old triplet girls. Her figure was trim, she was friendly and didn't look old and worn out.

I don't know how she does it.

Apples!

Drew called me a couple of hours ago to announce that he was eating his apple and Rachel was eating hers.

"Huh?" I asked, as I gathered my stuff to head out for an interview.

Turns out that Drew was eating an apple for lunch. Rachel kept looking at it and whining, so he figured why not let her try some? He sliced off a thin piece and she LOVED it. She proceeded to crawl all over the dining room, holding it in her hand.

I can't wait until we can ply her with all the delicious varieties of apples we get at the Portland Farmers Market in the fall. Well, yes, I can definitely wait for fall and (ugh) winter. Right now I just want to turn her on to as many varieties of BERRIES as I can.

Dancin' queen....

Shannon, one of the daycare ladies, told Drew that Rachel was DANCING today in daycare! They played some music and she was really moving around to the beat.

And for lunch, she apparently ate part of a "roll-up," which the folks at St. James call enchiladas.

Drew says he needs to visit St. James at lunchtime to figure out exactly what they feed her and why she seems to eat big-people food there, but not here.

We tried to give her the rest of her bottle in a sippy cup tonight, and she didn't drink much of it. She does, however, drink water in the cup. She's an expert at holding it delicately, sipping, throwing it on the floor, waving it around the air...sigh.

Future softball player?

Rachel has developed quite the throwing arm. Her favorite game is to throw a clear rubber ball a couple of feet in front of her, crawl after it, grab it, then throw it again. Her coordination is fantastic -- when I roll the ball to her, she always manages to catch it with one hand.

She can do this over and over.

It takes a village

I decided to bake chicken and pasta for a friend of mine who just had her second child, also a girl. And I also threw in some strawberry bread I made a couple of weeks ago and froze.

"This is your way of paying it forward, isn't it?" Drew asked.

"When I had Rachel, I felt like the whole city fed me and took care of me," I said. "So, now it's my turn."

"Hillary Clinton only got it half right," he replied. "It takes a village to raise a mom."

Walking & grownup food

Rachel took two steps Saturday night! She was holding onto my hands the whole time, and she promptly went kerplunk on the ground when she was finished, but still...baby steps! Drew is positive that within weeks she'll be walking on her own.

I'm amazed she doesn't cry when she plops down, but I bet her diaper is a good cushion.

Also, this morning I fed her some thick and creamy vanilla yogurt Drew bought yesterday. She ate about a third of the container before turning away. She also regularly eats Cheerios and circular-shaped rice crackers, so we're going to be more aggressive about giving her big-people food. It's clear she's interested, especially in strawberries!

Baby nightmares?

Rachel woke up at 3 a.m. Sunday, screaming and crying inconsolably. I walked into her room and she was kneeling in the crib with a distressed look on her face. So I picked her up, brought her to the glider and slowly rocked her back down to sleep. When I put her back in the crib, she cried again, then went to sleep.

Last night she was very hard to get down -- kept screaming as if all hell was breaking loose. Finally Drew got her to sleep at around 11. She cried out at 3 a.m., but then pressed one of the buttons on the music box we've fastened to the crib. It plays gentle lullabies, and it's clear she uses that to get her back to sleep.

This morning she wasn't very cheerful when I walked in her room, probably because I had to make the bed and throw on some clothes before I got there. But she started smiling when I read her the two big picture books she grabs for every morning -- "Clip-clop," about a horse who lets all the barnyard animals ride on his back; and "Ten little fingers and ten little toes" about babies born all over the world.

At daycare, she cried when I set her down on the playmat. Since no one was available to take her, I cuddled her into my chest and rocked her on one of the gliders. Then, when one of the daycare ladies tried to pick her up, she clung to me. Her little fingers grabbed onto my shirt and wouldn't let go!

Of course, as soon as she was in someone else's arms, she forgot Mommy immediately. I have a feeling when I pick her up later, she'll be so happy playing that she won't want to go home!

Rachel's brain

Drew is reading a book about how babies' brains work, and he told me last night that at about 1 year of age or so, babies will grab blocks and other things and try to play with them in different combinations, as if to figure them out.

He said he noticed that last night, when I was working late and he was playing with Rachel, she kept grabbing different-shaped plastic toys like a star, a circle and a square and banged them together. Then she'd toss one aside and pick up a different-shaped block and banged it against the first block, as if she was searching for a particular sound the blocks made. She was doing this with great concentration.

"I don't know what you're looking for, sweetie," he told her, "but I hope you find it!"

Songs I can no longer sing

..because they make me cry:

--"Sunrise, Sunset"
--"Far from the home I love"
(both of the above are from the musical version of "Fiddler on the Roof")
--"Lullabye," by Billy Joel, which my chorus will sing for an upcoming performance for the Lutheran Women's Association, 3,500 strong, at a convention here in Portland.

I was singing "Lullabye" in chorus practice last night and I couldn't stop the tears, even though I've sung it over and over. Joel wrote the song when his daughter, Alexa, was a baby. There's a section in it that goes:

Goodnight, my angel
Now it's time to dream
And dream how wonderful your life will be
Someday your child may cry
And if you sing this lullabye
Then in your heart
There will always be a part of me

Every time I sing this song, it reminds me that someday Rachel will be grown up, with her own children and her own life. And I'm starting to cry right now thinking of it, that my little girl will one day be gone for good.

Wistful dad

..Drew and I were talking last night, me reminding him that we really need to start weaning Rachel from her bottle and get her to use a cup. She's growing up too fast, he said.

"How long do you want her to be a baby, anyway?" I asked.

"For a couple more years," he said. "I just want to be able to keep playing with her!"

Rachel attacks a strawberry

"Attacks" is the verb Drew used to describe her enthusiasm. He was unloading a pint of strawberries from the farmers market on Saturday when Rachel grabbed a strawberry, popped it in her mouth and chewed and chewed and chewed, getting strawberry juice all down the legs of her jeans.

On Sunday morning, Drew cut up a bunch of strawberries for me and we fed some to Rachel. When I looked up from the newspaper, she had a huge grin on her face and strawberry pieces all over her. I couldn't help thinking that she looked as if she was either the witness or the killer at a gruesome crime scene. Luckily she was in her "feeding clothes," an outfit that we don't care gets dirty. We're told that some parents, when their kids are learning to eat, strip their kids down to their diapers and feed them mostly naked, then just hose them off or draw them a bath.

Yesterday the red on her bib was for real -- Rachel was playing with Drew in the living room when she bumped her chin on the hardwood floor. It looked mild, but then the blood came, fast, and she started really crying. She calmed down quickly when Drew took her in his lap and cuddled her. He gave her a frozen teething ring and she sucked on it, as if she knew she needed to, to get the bleeding to stop. Eventually it did, but we wound up getting to Doug & Linda's barbecue later than we wanted. Everyone admired Rachel, though. She's getting so big! they said.

And this morning, I made the mistake of reading the last chapters of "What to Expect (when you're expecting) -- the first year." I now realized there are a bunch of things we should have been/should be doing with Rachel -- weaning her from a bottle, teaching her pronouns, telling her about colors, shapes, etc. I tend to talk to her when I'm cooking dinner and explain what I'm doing, but when we're alone and she's playing on the blanket, I'll read or just watch her, or join in. But I don't chatter at her constantly. It's not in my nature.

I guess I thought she'd just pick this stuff up at daycare or from being out in the world -- just like she spontaneously started pulling up, saying "mama" and "dada," and putting her arms through her shirtsleeves. Big error on my part.

Rachel's gifts

Lately, Rachel has been in an exceptionally generous mood. She tries to give me everything -- starting with her pacifier yesterday morning after I gave her her bottle. She was quite insistent that I put the nipple end in my mouth.

Then, yesterday afternoon, I gave her my keys to play with. When she was finished, she handed them to me with a smile. I try to make a habit of saying, "May I have my keys back, please? Thank you, Rachel!" just to get an early start on good manners.

Yesterday evening, though, she outmaneuvered me. She tried to offer me a Cheerio (after she had gummed it within an inch of its life; you can imagine how sticky and gross it was). As I was about to take it, she snatched it back, with a huge smile.

Our friend Kim thought this was hilarious. "Hah!" she said. "Faked you out, mommy!"

Summer in the park

Rachel and I hung out most of yesterday at Wilshire Park, a great park with play equipment sized for kids Rachel's age and older. She was even able to "steer" a pretend car! And she loved the swings. She gets a huge grin on her face and starts giggling whenever she goes high in the air.

We had started the day by trying to go to "Book Babies," a book-reading activity at a library in Southeast Portland. But it was too crowded! It gives you an idea of how literate Portland parents are.

She had a rough time getting down for a nap yesterday. I finally wrapped her in a big blanket and held her in my arms. She fell asleep for 40 minutes, and so did I! Our glider is so relaxing, we plan to keep it long after she's grown.

Our friend Kim came over for dinner last night. Rachel screamed at the sight of her at first, but by the end of the evening was offering her Cheerios. She was quite restless at bedtime but, after a shriek or two, settled down.

Now I am at work and Rachel gets daddy all to herself today, after he was gone three days instead of the usual two. He couldn't wait to get home to see her.

Can it be?

...that Rachel is 11 MONTHS OLD TODAY?? How did that happen?

She is:

--crawling everywhere. And starting to open cabinets. We need to put more baby locks on the ones closest to the floor in the kitchen. One of her favorite activities is following me into the kitchen, grabbing the magnets off the refrigerator, gumming them and throwing them on the floor.

--pulling up, albeit infrequently. She can pull herself to a standing position but can't quite hold it yet. And even when we encourage her, she shows no interest in walking.

--starting to eat some grownup foods, like slices of strawberry and watermelon. And anytime she won't eat jarred baby food (like tonight), she'll take Cheerios and rice crackers from Trader Joe's. I think it's because both of them are small, perfect for baby hands!

--developing teeth. She has six, four on the bottom and two on top, and a seventh on the top is rapidly poking through.

--babbling a lot, and occasionally a word or two will come through. Tonight it was "daddy," by accident. A couple of weeks ago it was "love you." But she's not really talking yet. We're giving it time.

--Holding her bottle by herself 90 percent of the time. And she's rapidly losing interest in formula, which is great because our pediatrician says we can start giving her milk on her first birthday. Hooray! No more spending $30 a week on formula!

--cuddly when she's tired or just needs a break. Lately she's developed the habit of, after I give her her final bottle for the night, pulling back from my chest and giving me a goofy grin. I usually crack up because she's so funny. So, she grins even more. I could do this for hours.

--so far, a happy, playful baby and an endless source of wonder and amusement for her parents.

And so it begins...

Drew went to pick up Rachel from daycare on Tuesday night. He reported that she gave him a big smile...and kept right on playing.

"This is how it starts," he told Shannon, one of the daycare ladies. "In a couple of years, she'll take me for granted."

Yesterday when I picked her up, she was crying. Turns out a toddler crashed into her and Rachel bit her cheek. Shannon was wiping blood from her mouth and gave me an icy teething ring to put in Rachel's mouth.

Instead, I took her to the infants section, sat down in a glider and held her close. "Shh, it's ok," I kept murmuring. "Mommy's here. Mommy's here." She calmed down after a while and even smiled before we left.

Today, Shannon said, she had a great day. Shannon spent most of the time with Rachel because when Rachel was on the playmat and saw Shannon, she gave her an expectant look and an explanation of happiness, and Shannon was so charmed that she swept her up in her arms.

Tomorrow is my 2nd furlough day, and I plan to spend it using as little money as possible because it is, after all, an unpaid day off work. We may join a mom's group at the Eastbank Esplanade if we're up and moving early enough; if not, we'll spend a relaxed day at the park reading, playing and swinging.

Furlough days stink, but I love summer. That makes up for it, sort of.

Rachel's social schedule

is already piling up. We got invited to a baby birthday party on June 27th for Macy, who turns 1. We met Macy and her parents Jennifer and Mike at a party back in April for another baby who turned 1. Jennifer and Mike were in the Peace Corps, and both are social workers. Very nice folks. We had a playdate today, and the girls had a fun time at the park. Macy was a little more active than Rachel, who was in an unexpectedly cuddly mood (we suspect she is slightly under the weather with a tummy bug that has dimmed her appetite).

But Rachel had a great time on the swings and fell asleep in the car for the five-minute ride home. Drew put her down for a nap at 4:30 and she slept until almost 7!

Then I burned the grilled chicken (yes, I know, I co-authored a book on barbecue). But we still managed to eat dinner and get Rachel down for the night by 9 p.m.

And now, having plowed through much of the clutter on the dining room table and feeling frustrated I didn't get more done (like balancing my checkbook, emailing friends, doing all the other zillion things I always seem to be behind on), I am going to sleep.

We are hoping The Little Girl doesn't wake us crying, like she did last night. She settled down soon enough, but it took me the longest time to get back to sleep. I think I will take my sister's advice and keep granola bars, or maybe applesauce, next to the bed because I always seem to get hungry when Rachel wakes us in the middle of the night.

Pulling up

for real! Drew and I walked into Rachel's bedroom Friday morning to find her STANDING UP COMPLETELY and peering over her crib rail. "You need to lower the crib," I told Drew, with nightmares of Rachel pitching over the rail and landing on her head in my mind. "Tonight," he agreed.

Then yesterday, while I was posting a crime story on The Oregonian's Web site, Drew called me. "POSTED!" he said excitedly. "Rachel stood up all by herself and leaned against the music table!" (it's a table with a top of piano keys and other buttons that when you push, they make music).

Drew didn't get to lowering the crib until after I got home from work yesterday, when Rachel and I went on a playdate with a friend of mine from the newspapers and her son, Parker, who is four months older than Rachel. We found a great park within a mile or so of our house, which has playground equipment perfectly sized for little ones. (Grant Park, closer by, has swings and great play equipment, but it's sized for toddlers and older kids).

You could clearly see the difference between Parker and Rachel: Parker spent most of the time trying to eat dirt and playing with shovels that were taller than he is; Rachel was in a cuddly mood and spent most of the time on my lap or in my arms. At one point I sat on the edge of the sand pit with her leaning against my chest, singing "Heigh Ho" to her. (I reminded Dad this morning how he used to sing that song to me. It's a Peter, Paul & Mary round-robin song, and every time I sing it it reminds me of how much Mom and Dad listened to Peter, Paul & Mary. The things you discover about your parents when you have kids of your own!)

When I got home, Drew had lowered the crib to its lowest setting. "Are you SURE we need to do this?" I asked wistfully. It means that when she gets big enough to peer over the edge of this lowest setting, we'll have to think of getting her a real, big-girl bed. I'm told this happens around age 2 or so. "Yes," he replied firmly.

I made him promise that we can keep the crib once we get Rachel a bed, just in case Rachel has children. Or in case we have another one of our own, which is currently under discussion.

Closer to standing...

Which sounds, if you think of it, like a good name for a college rock band.

Anyway, I was at work trying to figure out what my new bus schedule is since TriMet is cutting back on bus service to save money, and I called home to tell Drew I'd be late. OH MY GOD! he said suddenly. Turns out that Rachel had leaned on his thighs while he was sitting down, and pulled herself to a standing position all by herself! She couldn't support it for long, but just the fact she did it was amazing.

The other day I was reading from "The Very Hungry Caterpillar" -- a classic that Drew remembered from childhood -- and I was at the very beginning, when the egg that is on a leaf opens up and a caterpillar bursts out with the sunrise. As I read from that page, which has a big sun on it, Rachel said a decisive "No!"

"Really, Rachel?" I said, laughing. "OK, we'll tell it your way."

She proceeded to grab the small, square book and gum away. In some ways, she is not as old as we think.

Clap clap clap...

When I picked up Rachel from daycare yesterday, I exclaimed, "Rachel!" like I usually do. She greeted me with a smile and then clapped her little hands together.

She did the same thing when she saw Drew through the window as he arrived home around 8 p.m. last night from Seattle. And she clapped again this morning when we walked into her room and sang "good morning" to her.

I love being applauded, even if it's by a 10 1/2-month old.