Rachel is very naughty

Last night was one of the more bummer aspects of parenting. I had had an exhausting week, it was hot, I was sort of sick with a cold but I didn't stay home...and all we wanted to do was to eat pizza for Shabbat and then go out for ice cream.

We did indeed eat pizza at 8, then at 8:30 Rachel decided she really wanted to change into the fairy costume that Auntie Amanda and Auntie Jenn had gotten her. (She has already decided to wear her fairy wings to dinner, which was OK by us). We shooed her away because we needed to finish our salads and talk a bit, and so she went into her room to try to get dressed herself.

She couldn't, of course (she can't yet manage the buttons on the back of her dress) and so she came into the kitchen for help. Drew explained that he didn't want to change her into another outfit, she started whining and pouting (an intensely annoying habit we are strenuously trying to break her of) and then he strode angrily into the kitchen and announced, "I don't think we'll be going out for ice cream tonight."

Rachel started crying loudly, and when Drew picked her up she yelled, "NO!!" in a voice I've never heard before. (She immediately followed it with, "I won't ever do that again!!") He said, "OK, you're going to bed RIGHT NOW," and then he undressed her, took her into the bathroom and put her to bed -- no books, no story, no cuddling -- and ll the while she was sobbing her heart out. "Do you still love me??" she cried at one point, and Drew answered firmly, "I'm not very happy with you right now," and she cried even harder. She was still crying when he put her to bed.

Later he apologized to me that Shabbat had to end that way. He was right to punish her but I still winced inside. I guess we won't escape the yucky part of parenting -- the whining, the disciplining, the having an unhappy person in our house (whether it lasts for minutes or years) -- but it sure isn't fun when it happens. The main thing that concerns Drew is that he doesn't want Rachel to tell us how things are going to be in our house; SHE is the child and and WE are the parents. We don't ever want her to think that if she cries and whines and pouts long enough, she'll get her way.

(All was fine today. She apologized to Drew while they were at the farmer's market and they made a "pinky promise" -- they locked pinkies and shook on it -- that she would never do that again).