Rachel aces swim lessons!

Haven't spent much time with The Little Girl today; Drew took her to dance class and swim lessons and out to lunch while I worked on what hopefully will be a paying freelance story from home. I'm heading to my friend Deni's house tonight for a Moonstruck-themed women's-only party and am bringing a homemade almond poppyseed bundt cake with a light almond-flavored glaze. For any of you drooling with envy, organize a party and I will gladly bring dessert!

This was Rachel's first day back at swim class after a three-month absence and apparently she aced it! We have had limited success in the past with getting in the water with her during lessons. I signed us up while Drew was gone and sometimes she loved them and other times she was whiny when she didn't get to play with a toy she wanted or I hurried her out of the pool too soon. Drew and I were kind of dreading this round, but we are absolutely determined that she know how to swim.

Well, apparently we needn't have worried, she was great! She got right in the water with other four kids (Drew thinks the small size of the class worked in her favor) and blew bubbles (this is the kid who didn't want to put any part of her face in the water last year)! She was a little reluctant to get on a group kickboard with everyone because it sagged in the middle, but she was perfectly okay when the instructor held her back while Rachel spread her body out in the water like a starfish. Yay!

I was also very pleased to hear that after Drew bought her a little bag of chocolate goldfish crackers, Rachel made a point of sharing them with Drew; a woman who sat on the bench next to them; and her dance teacher, Allison. She got very upset when she came home and thought that the goldfish cracker she'd saved for me was gone. I told her I wasn't hungry anyway, but Drew ended up finding it and she was so pleased to be able to give a little present to Mommy!

I told Drew that as soon as I pitch this story -- probably two weekends from now -- I will accompany them to dance and swim class just to watch Rachel in action. I'll be glad to take a short break from extracurricular writing on weekends because it's a lot of work.

I've been displaced

...as the person who says the Sabbath prayer and the blessing over the bread and wine (in my case, hard cider).

 Tonight Rachel announced that SHE wanted to say the prayers aloud herself. "Don't say the prayers, Mommy," she instructed me. So she said the prayer recognizably, as well as the blessing over the motzi and wine, and I was so proud of her that I bent down and kissed her on the cheek and said, "I am so PROUD of you!"

 The fact that we must, at her insistence, listen to a CD of Jewish songs every night probably has something to do with it. I can't wait until she's ready for Hebrew school!

***

This morning, on the way to preschool, Rachel said: "Mommy, you're a medium-sized girl. And Daddy is very big!"

 ***

Rachel has suddenly gotten very clingy at bedtime.

"Stay. Stay. Stay!" she urged tonight.

"Why do you want me to stay with you?" I asked.

"Because I want someone to cuddle with me all night!" she said.

"Well, who's going to cuddle with Daddy when he gets home?" I said.

"He can sleep by himself!" she said.

"I think he wants to cuddle with Mommy," I replied.

"Grandpa can cuddle with him!" she suggested.

"Sweetie, Grandpa lives in New York!" I exclaimed.

"He can take a train underground and come to our house!" she said.

I finally convinced her that Daddy doesn't like to cuddle with boys, he likes to cuddle with girls. And besides, Grandpa probably wouldn't want to cuddle with Daddy anyway. Right, Grandpa?

Wistful Mommy and Little Girl

Nothing I am aware of precipitated the following exchange in the car on the way home from preschool tonight:

Rachel: I really wish I had a little brother or sister.
Me: You mean, a real one? (I was thinking, as opposed to a doll?)
Rachel: Yes.
Me: Why, sweetie?
Rachel (sniffling ever so slightly): Because I want to be a good big sister!

I could have said so many things, but instead I thought a minute and said, "We've tried, sweetie. I don't know if I've ever told you." She was silent and then we talked about the present we were going to buy for her little friend Tessa, whose 4th birthday party is this weekend.

***

At Fred Meyer, where we bought Tessa a Hello Kitty bingo game, Rachel suddenly started crying. "I'm worried no one's going to give me presents for MY birthday," she said.

I hugged her a couple of times and then gave her a gentle lecture on how it's good to give gifts to friends, and that just because we were buying a gift for Tessa didn't mean that Rachel wouldn't get hers eventually. In other words: Life is not a zero-sum game. I figured the zero-sum game part was too complicated to explain and besides, I'm no longer sure of it myself.


***

I ended up buying Rachel a new coloring book and a Cinderella/Beauty and the Beast story and sticker book. She was enchanted with the stickers and offered to give me five of them.

"Five!" I exclaimed. "That's a lot. I must be really special. Or, you must really like me."

"You ARE special and I DO like you," she said cheerfully. Ah, she makes me feel so good!!

Guest post from Drew

OK, so we were parking on the street outside the New Seasons on Division Street (closest one on the way home from school), and Rachel, who was munching granola in the back seat as is her wont, asked if she could stay in the car.

I said "No, sweetie, I'm probably going to be in the store a little while, and it's not a good idea to leave little people all alone in the car."

 

"Why?" she asked. Before I could reply she added, "Will a bad guy take me?"

 

"Oh, I don't know about that, sweetie, but I wouldn't want to take that risk."

 

Then, as I was unbuckling her, she got her little worried look and she said "I'm worried that we're going to be in the store for a long, long, long time, and somebody's going to take our car."

 

I laughed at the idea she thought she could, and should, guard our car (the New Seasons being in a fairly upscale part of town). Then I said, "Well, first thing, we're not going to be in the store *that* long. And I've been driving for a long time and nobody's ever taken my car. And besides, if a bad guy wanted to take our car, he could take it and take you too, because you'd be in the back seat!"

 

That seemed reasonable to her, so we went in and did our marketing without incident. On the way back, I pointed to the car and said "Oh my goodness, look at that! Our car is *still there*!"

 

Rachel bent over and laughed, I guess because she knew I was teasing her gently.

The two sides of Rachel

This is from Drew last night (I was at chorus practice):

As Drew was giving Rachel a bath, she told him she was going to wash her rubber duckies.

Drew: Do you want a few minutes to wash the duckies while I take care of some stuff?
Rachel: Yeah.
Drew, after coming back: OK, time to get out.
Rachel: I'm going to hold onto my baby duck very closely because she's wet and scared.

***

Drew asked Rachel to make up a story about Princess Rachel finding a monster. Rachel said she and bunch of her friends went out to fight a really, really big monster. Then they went back to the palace to have a really big snack. The snack was chocolate princess bananas (the chocolate chips were in the shape of princesses) with strawberry juice.

Rachel: I ate, like, a million snacks.
Drew: How come?
Rachel: Well, because I did most of the fighting.
Drew: That makes sense, I guess. You did most of the work so you should get most of the treats.
Rachel: Yeah. The other kids didn't do very much, so they only got to eat two.

Civic duty

Portland Public Schools is considering a boundary change in our elementary school district. The boundary change line runs right down the middle of our street, so Drew and I discussed whether we should attend a public hearing tonight. I offered to go, which I figured I'd do after I swam (but never made it because I was at work until 6).

It was a very interesting meeting. I used to cover the Portland School Board, and it was odd seeing everyone again, including Superintendent Carole Smith. She rushed up to me after the meeting to give me a hug, and I made sure to show her a picture of Rachel. She exclaimed over how cute she is, and then she thanked me and my former colleague, Kim Melton, for our coverage of PPS. "You really dug into stuff," Carole said, and she said she appreciated that both of us could devote so much time to the beat. I got the feeling that she's frustrated with the current state of the Oregonian's education team, which looks like it's down to one reporter who also has to cover state education issues. It already seems like such a long time since I've worked there.

Mom and Dad, I also finally met Dawn Menken! She testified in favor of the proposed boundary change. We had a nice chat afterward, exchanged phone numbers and we hope to have her over for dinner sometime. She immediately knew who you were, than you were friends with her parents, etc. She sends her son to a magnet arts school because she believes that Alameda Elementary, the one near our house, is a little too pressure-filled academically. She also told us that it's wealthy and not very diverse (which we knew). One parent with kids there apparently works for Intel and so the kids all have great computers in their classrooms, plus they have a lot of other extras that less-fortunate schools don't have. But it's crowded, which the boundary change will hopefully lessen.

I also chatted with Robb Cowie, the school's chief spokesman, about middle schools vs. K-8s, magnet schools, talented and gifted programs, etc. He said he's amazed Rachel is almost ready for kindergarten; he remembered when she was born (the board members sent me a card and lovely gift, which of course I had to return. I appreciated the gesture, though). I told him I can't wait until kindergarten round-up next year, when we get to hear all about the schools out there for Rachel. We are guaranteed attendance at our local school; if we want an out-of-neighborhood magnet or K-8, we have to go through the lottery.

But we likely won't do that because we found out that...ALAMEDA ELEMENTARY will be Rachel's school!!! The school board is scheduled to formally vote on it in two weeks, which is why they held a public hearing tonight. What a relief! Here's how close we came to having to go to another school: the boundary line does, indeed, run right down our street. Kids who live on the east side of the street like us go to Alameda; kids on the west side don't. That means Rachel will get a great start at one of the best elementaries in the city that hopefully wont be as crowded as this year. (And, should we ever need to sell our house, the fact that it's in the Alameda boundary means we'll get a good price). Yay!!!

***

Cute Rachel saying today:

We were talking about Halloween, and I told her it was a long way off -- October.

"China is far-er than Halloween," she said. (For some reason she has an obsession with China. David and Anne, I'm not surprised if she gets that from you!!:))

Birthday party!

Rachel went to the birthday party of her friend Noah, who is turning 5. (Actually, Noah is the son of a friend of MINE, Sarah, with whom I worked at the Oregonian). The party was held at the Southwest Community Center and it was so well done -- the kids spent an hour in the gym, and then went to the party room. The gym was outfitted with a kid's trampoline, a slide, gym mats, scooters and tricycles. Rachel went in hesitantly but then grabbed a trike and was off...without a backward glance at Mommy. Luckily some of my former colleagues from the O were there, so it was a nice chance to catch up with everyone.

In the party room Rachel made a crown, ate string cheese and apples and had a piece of cake while I mostly sat on the sidelines and watched. One of the moms is giving a party for her daughter NEXT weekend, so that's yet another social obligation for Rachel.

I couldn't help thinking throughout the party that wouldn't it be interesting and cool if all the kids stayed friends through elementary, middle and high school, and they all just kept going to each others' birthday parties, although eventually we parents will just drop them off and leave, and really eventually we won't even go or even hear about the parties; we'll find out about them after the fact. Odd to think that if we stay in Portland, we really will have put down roots here (in October we'll have lived her 15 years! How did THAT happen??)

***

Tonight my friend Julie from chorus and her husband Peter brought over some dinner -- Julie wanted to test out some chicken pot pies she plans to serve her bridge club in a few weeks. So she brought the pot pies and some brussels sprouts, and I made salad and a chocolate chip cake. (Drew did a light cleaning of the house, which really needed it. He also built a fire, which made everything quite cozy. I hope we always have a fireplace wherever we live).

"I remember you!" Rachel exclaimed as she sat next to Julie on the couch. It's true, Julie came over several times when Rachel was a baby and also when she was a toddler. Julie was a big help to me in those first few months, bringing me food and encouraging me when I felt overwhelmed. I feel as if I can never pay her back, so every time she suggests getting together, I do, even if it's inconvenient.

Both Julie and Peter exclaimed over how adorable Rachel is (they have five grandchildren ages 4 and under, so they're excellent with small kids) and Julie wasn't hurt even when Rachel said some inappropriate things about the chicken in the pot pies -- "it tastes like garbage," she murmured at one point, and I later scolded her for saying that. I hope she listens, because I cringed when it came out of her mouth. She whined and fussed about eating dinner until both Drew and I told her firmly (even when she came over to my side and pouted and tried to cuddle) that she couldn't have dessert until she finished her dinner of a sandwich and at least one piece of chicken.

"It'll kill me," she said earnestly. That's becoming a habit of hers that we are trying to break immediately.

"No, it won't," we reassured her, and made sure to point out that, in fact, eating a piece of chicken didn't kill her and that she had been silly to say something so dramatic.