Drew and I had a huge fight tonight about weaning Rachel from the bottle. She is great about drinking water from her sippy cup but refuses milk except in a bottle. I'm afraid that if we don't offer her milk in a bottle she won't drink it; Drew firmly believes we need to wean her. "She's in the only one in Toddler 1s who still drinks from a bottle," he said angrily.
I would love to rid our house of bottles; for one, it would open up space on our kitchen counter, where we put the bottles, nipples, caps, etc. to dry. But I keep thinking of friends of ours who have a 3-year-old who takes a bottle of milk at night. It's a sleep cue, my friend says confidently. And their daughter seems normal, so why rush it? I also think that it will be easier to explain to Rachel when she's older and can understand why she can't drink from a bottle -- the "bottle fairy" took them away, or we lost the bottle and now she has to drink from a cup, etc.
So tonight, to bolster his argument, Drew brought out The Book -- "What to Expect/The toddler years," which is my generation's version of Dr. Spock -- and it said that we really should be weaning her from the bottle. So I agreed to start her gradually -- offer milk in a sippy cup at night but not in a bottle. And then gradually make a complete switch.
But...what if she never drinks milk again? How can that possibly be good for her development??
About the binkies: Drew has a much higher tolerance for her crying. I told him that social pressure will cause her to stop using a binkie when it's time; he's started not giving them to her unless she really starts wailing. In all fairness, she seems to use them less and less these days. So I guess I better just suck it up and put up with the fussiness.
What I didn't appreciate was the implication that I'm undermining Drew's parenting, or that I give in to Rachel as soon as she starts whining and fussing. I try not to. Really.
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At Goldie's 12-month check-up, her pediatrician told me to start weaning her from the bottle. She said one way to do it is fill the bottle with water. She said prepare for her to get good and mad about it, but by putting water instead of milk in it, she would want the bottle less (if at all). I am only now trying to truly start weaning her from the bottle, however, and she's almost 18 months old. Also, milk is not the only way for Rachel to get calcium -- just give her extra cheese, yogurt, etc.
ReplyDeleteWeaning her from the bottle will be easier than the binky (for both of you) most likely. I am surprised that your friend's pediatrician said it was ok for a 3y.o. to drink from a bottle. A friend of mine was scolded when her ped found out she was giving her then 2 1/2 y.o. a bottle so she imeediately stopped. With both of my boys we just stopped giving them a bottle and they didn't fuss at all so she might not care. As far as the differing parenting philosophies go, what I would do is compromise with Drew and stop giving her the bottle but continue with the binky. That way you aren't expecting her to give up two comfort items at once. Remove the bottle and then in some agree upon amount of time wean her from the binky. Then neither of you feels like you don't have a voice in these decisions. You will most likely have to remove the binky rather than waiting for her to stop ousing it on her own. I have a friend whose child still used a binky at 4 when she finally weaned him and he would use it out in public, around his friends, none of whom were still using a binky and it didn't seem to bother him that none of the other kids sucked on a binky.
ReplyDeleteGood luck! I'm sure it will be much easier than you think.