So, while I was still upset over the whole Sydney/end-of-the-year party incident, Rachel did something that I thought was pretty remarkable.
She told Sydney, or Sydney somehow found out, that Simone would, in fact, be coming to her party. She demanded of Rachel, "Why did you invite her?"
"I didn't invite her, my mom did," Rachel said.
"Tell her not to do that!" Sydney said.
"No," Rachel replied. "Simone is my friend."
"Oh, FINE," Sydney apparently said, and stomped off.
That kid is headed for "mean girl" status in middle school, if not before, and I find it extremely difficult to be pleasant to her these days (although I must say that the few times she's been in the house, she is noticeably more polite that she used to be. Probably because she senses that Drew and I just will not put up with bullshit). I just hope that Rachel won't stick with her or put up with abuse because of loyalty. But her standing up for herself was a good start.
Tuesday, July 26, 2016
A conversation with Ms. Burke
So, I was so upset about what had happened with Sydney and Simone that I ended up talking with Ms. Burke about it. (In addition, Kelly, the mom of one of Rachel's friends, Libby, had mentioned that Rachel and Sydney seemed to spend all their time together and that she tried to separate them at Brownie meetings because they were monopolizing each other. And, more disturbingly, that Sydney was unfriendly to Kelly and that Rachel, when she was in Sydney's company, was unfriendly, too. Kelly said that it seemed that a cloud had come over Rachel this year, which I pegged to Sydney's influence.)
Ms. Burke, who is something like 26, said she would talk to her mom, who is also a teacher, about how she had kept her daughter away from girls who were bad influences in middle school. But she clearly remembers that there was one girl that her mother forbade her to have sleepovers with (even though, Ms. Burke acknowledged, she probably could have handled the situation on her own and her father would have okayed the sleepovers because he wasn't really aware of what was going on).
She also, much to my relief, said she would recommend against Rachel and Sydney being placed in the same third-grade class next year. Drew and I plan to write a letter to the principal reinforcing that next month, just to be sure.
Ms. Burke, who is something like 26, said she would talk to her mom, who is also a teacher, about how she had kept her daughter away from girls who were bad influences in middle school. But she clearly remembers that there was one girl that her mother forbade her to have sleepovers with (even though, Ms. Burke acknowledged, she probably could have handled the situation on her own and her father would have okayed the sleepovers because he wasn't really aware of what was going on).
She also, much to my relief, said she would recommend against Rachel and Sydney being placed in the same third-grade class next year. Drew and I plan to write a letter to the principal reinforcing that next month, just to be sure.
Sydney
At the annual McKinley auction, Drew and I successfully bid on some free passes to Flight, bounce house about an hour away. We told Rachel that she could invite three friends, and she chose Sydney, Simone and Kennedy. She said she'd take care of asking all three.
A few nights before the event, we asked Rachel who was coming. She said that Simone had declined because she has a free pass to Flight and could go anytime. That seemed odd to me, especially since I had told Simone's dad, Larry, about the party during the botanic gardens field trip. (Simone has a lot of activities and family things, so it's hard to catch her for a playdate, and I was especially interested in her coming to this one.)
I emailed Larry about Simone's refusal and he said that seemed odd to him, too.
I came to learn that what happened was that Sydney had expressed displeasure about Simone coming, and Simone heard about it and said she didn't care. When Drew and I finally got that out of Rachel, I was absolutely livid. I told Rachel in no uncertain terms that from now on, Mom and Dad would be in charge of invitations. Then I marched into the study, called Larry and just plunged in: I explained the confusion, apologized for it and said we would LOVE to have Simone come. I ended up planning the timing around an event Simone had to go to the day of the party.
Larry mentioned that it was sad that Sydney was being a "mean girl" and trying to get the other kids to bend to her will, and I agreed -- and grimly resolved to myself that I would never let this happen again.
A few nights before the event, we asked Rachel who was coming. She said that Simone had declined because she has a free pass to Flight and could go anytime. That seemed odd to me, especially since I had told Simone's dad, Larry, about the party during the botanic gardens field trip. (Simone has a lot of activities and family things, so it's hard to catch her for a playdate, and I was especially interested in her coming to this one.)
I emailed Larry about Simone's refusal and he said that seemed odd to him, too.
I came to learn that what happened was that Sydney had expressed displeasure about Simone coming, and Simone heard about it and said she didn't care. When Drew and I finally got that out of Rachel, I was absolutely livid. I told Rachel in no uncertain terms that from now on, Mom and Dad would be in charge of invitations. Then I marched into the study, called Larry and just plunged in: I explained the confusion, apologized for it and said we would LOVE to have Simone come. I ended up planning the timing around an event Simone had to go to the day of the party.
Larry mentioned that it was sad that Sydney was being a "mean girl" and trying to get the other kids to bend to her will, and I agreed -- and grimly resolved to myself that I would never let this happen again.
Thursday, July 21, 2016
Class blog
Yes, Rachel's class had its own blog this year. Here is what Rachel posted in mid-June:
I have never ever posted!!! I wonder why Ms. Burke doesn't let us use emojis??? Hmm. I'll come back to that one. READ THIS POST RIGHT NOW!!
She also reads news-o-metic, a news site for kids, on her iPad regularly. She calls it "my favorite app EVER."
This is why we were able to have a very lucid and enlightening conversation with her about Brexit. She knew it was about immigration, that it involved England, etc. etc. It really is a pleasure to have conversations with her at the dinner table these days.
I have never ever posted!!! I wonder why Ms. Burke doesn't let us use emojis??? Hmm. I'll come back to that one. READ THIS POST RIGHT NOW!!
She also reads news-o-metic, a news site for kids, on her iPad regularly. She calls it "my favorite app EVER."
This is why we were able to have a very lucid and enlightening conversation with her about Brexit. She knew it was about immigration, that it involved England, etc. etc. It really is a pleasure to have conversations with her at the dinner table these days.
Weekend in the city
The weekend before Father's Day, we decided to go into the District. It was Rachel's suggestion to see the Jefferson Memorial, and we decided to take a paddleboat out, too.
Luckily our boat had a canopy because it was BEASTLY hot outside. We really had a great time paddling on the Potomac. Rachel started out with Drew, but quickly got tired and asked to rest. So I switched seats with her and paddled as far as the middle of the river, then turned around to go back. I thought I'd want two hours on the water, but I quickly got tired and realized that one hour was enough.
Then we walked to the Jefferson Memorial and explored the statue and the museum downstairs. On the way back, we walked past the FDR Memorial and then the Martin Luther King Jr. Memorial. But that time, Rachel and I had insisted that we wanted a snack (we had bought water with us, but quickly ran out -- and we'd had a late, big breakfast and hadn't planned for lunch).
Well, the snack bars run by the National Park Service close at 6, and the closest Metro was the Arlington National Cemetery one -- and, boy, was it a hot, ugly, uncomfortable slog back. Poor Rachel was practically dead by the time we got to the Metro, but she really kept her complaining to a minimum (and apologized that she hadn't done better when I praised her for keeping her chin up).
We decided to go to Pupatella, a local pizza place, for dinner, and then got ice cream -- FINALLY -- at Carvel. Great topping to an exhausting day.
Luckily our boat had a canopy because it was BEASTLY hot outside. We really had a great time paddling on the Potomac. Rachel started out with Drew, but quickly got tired and asked to rest. So I switched seats with her and paddled as far as the middle of the river, then turned around to go back. I thought I'd want two hours on the water, but I quickly got tired and realized that one hour was enough.
Then we walked to the Jefferson Memorial and explored the statue and the museum downstairs. On the way back, we walked past the FDR Memorial and then the Martin Luther King Jr. Memorial. But that time, Rachel and I had insisted that we wanted a snack (we had bought water with us, but quickly ran out -- and we'd had a late, big breakfast and hadn't planned for lunch).
Well, the snack bars run by the National Park Service close at 6, and the closest Metro was the Arlington National Cemetery one -- and, boy, was it a hot, ugly, uncomfortable slog back. Poor Rachel was practically dead by the time we got to the Metro, but she really kept her complaining to a minimum (and apologized that she hadn't done better when I praised her for keeping her chin up).
We decided to go to Pupatella, a local pizza place, for dinner, and then got ice cream -- FINALLY -- at Carvel. Great topping to an exhausting day.
A note to Mom and Dad
Rachel wrote this to us about a month before her birthday:
Dear mom & Dad, I know you will proboly say no to this but can I redecorate my room? PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEESE say yes! If you do, on your right is what my room likes like now, on your Left is what I want my room to look like. I hope you say yes!!
Your responsible & Loving daughter,
Rachel
P.S I also want to turn the wheel thing by my desk Into a...Nightstand!
Dear mom & Dad, I know you will proboly say no to this but can I redecorate my room? PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEESE say yes! If you do, on your right is what my room likes like now, on your Left is what I want my room to look like. I hope you say yes!!
Your responsible & Loving daughter,
Rachel
P.S I also want to turn the wheel thing by my desk Into a...Nightstand!
An autobiographical poem
Rachel and her classmates were assigned to write autobiographical poems in class. Here is what she had to say:
Rachel DeSilver
smart, funny, caring
Daughter of Drew and Lisa
Who loves Books. chocolete and cupcakes
Who feels passanite about The mets
Who needs a good Book, friends, and more chocolete
Who gives Hugs, Smiles, and laughs
Who fears Tornados, Hurricanes and Brussul Sprouts
Who'd like to see the great wall of china
Who dreams of traveling the world
A student of Ms. burke
Rachel
Rachel DeSilver
smart, funny, caring
Daughter of Drew and Lisa
Who loves Books. chocolete and cupcakes
Who feels passanite about The mets
Who needs a good Book, friends, and more chocolete
Who gives Hugs, Smiles, and laughs
Who fears Tornados, Hurricanes and Brussul Sprouts
Who'd like to see the great wall of china
Who dreams of traveling the world
A student of Ms. burke
Rachel
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